Milpitas Father of the year - 2010

This is more of achievement of Prem in verbalizing some of the things we do together. I feel parenting is an instinct, most of us react. I never considered myself as a confident parent, some of the times I was not sure as if I was doing the right thing, like which school to choose from, classes to enroll him in (I think he was overscheduled), is it too early to put him in school, sports etc. Prem was speech delayed; I was not sure if the special classes were helping Prem at all. Promila and I went to some parenting classes organized by ‘Frist 5’ and read few books. I think reading does not help much here, like I mentioned above, parenting is an instinct and at times it is difficult to be rational. Prem’s Asthma from 2nd year to 4th caused lot of angst in us and drove me to be overprotective, anxious most of the time. Here, trial and error; and reading did help in the end. No significant Asthma issues for two years now.

Speech delay and constant asthma episodes caused him to be behind in few things, like speaking up clearly and be confident. However, by now, over a period of time, I have become more relaxed around him. He met most of his development milestone, may be a bit late, but he did. Last year was great; though we still lugged Nebulizer around on vacations, we did not have to use it as much. We visited a lot of places. Three years ago, when I asked him about what did vacation means to him; he would reply going to ‘Great Mall’. Last year it was camping and going to Snow. And this year I asked him, he mentioned he wanted to go to New York and meet his cousins again. And he wanted to go to Yosemite too. He has hiked Mission Peak 4 times now.

Once I was talking to him about Reduce, Reuse and Recycle (Magic School Bus episode); and his school was also reinforcing on this. He asked me that he wanted to walk down from school instead of using car. We walked down on that day. Next day in morning, he woke up and told me that he was ready to hike Half Dome with me. I was a bit amused; asked him as what made him think about that (out of the blue). He mentioned, “Papa, yesterday while walking down from school, I did not get bored with you”. Ummm…….., I am sure he meant that as a compliment !

Like I mentioned earlier, a lot of credit for achievement is that of Prem; and rest is that of Promila to sit with him patiently and get it written. There are far more deserving dads out there than me. I did receive ‘Runners up – father of the year’ last year; again all credit to Prem and Promila. I put the last year plaque on my desk in office, to serve as nice and constant reminder to be more patient, learn new things and become better role model for him. As a parent, whether we like it or not, in most cases we are automatic role model for our kids; as they constantly watch us; even though at times it appears that they do not listen to us.

“It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself. “ ~Joyce Maynard